"Morning Has Broken"

One way to end the cycle of abuse in the early stages of recognition is not to take ownership of judgmental commentary, accusations and name-calling as well as the compulsion or garden-variety neurotic need to make you at fault or to blame for the situation and conditions. And, challenging though it may be, remove yourself from their sphere of operation.

Then, turn it around and resist the temptation to do the same.

I am thankful to and for life.
I am part of life.
I am thankful for my life.

bodily conditions of an international-returnee

Bodily conditions of an international-returnee.

FROM Tokyo
TO Southern California (small town)
FAMILY IN AREA: none
REASON FOR RETURN: to live holistically and inquire into matters of the mind through dialogue JOB: yes. PROVIDE MORE DETAILS IF NECESSARY: gainful employment with medical and dental benefits, regular hours, slice of meat-and-potatoes Americana.
Spouse: pending successful brain transplant
Children: none but I'm thinkin' about talking to doc Friends/Significant Others: y..y..y..y..Yes.

Ailments requiring medical attention:
Insomnia brought on by PTSD.
treatment: Valerian root taken nightly before bedtime.

Sciatica brought on by regularly driving a car; also, perhaps, sleeping on a bed.
treatment: stretching, rolfing; changing from bed to use of futon.

divurticulitis brought on by eating relatively unhealthy foods provided at workplace.
treatment: refrain, whenever possible, from eating in the dining hall of workplace.

All treatments appear to be working successfully. Patient no longer engaged in rolfing; has expressed desire to take more walks in morning before work. Diet improved significantly - suggest no further meals at work.

Don't Turn Around

I don't fully know how I'm gonna psychologically survive this winter and the holidays. I haven't found a cruising altitude yet...not yet in the 25.5 months I've been in California. And I am getting tired. But I must be...yes, I must be learning not to carry the burden of others in whatever form they arrive without them willing to be mutual. I wish to wrap myself in Commes de Garcon-black. And walk around some place like Warzawa or Berlin before the wall came down. Where is it like that now? A place where suffering is elevated to a sense of beauty; not that I want any part of that melodrama - I just want to observe it, like a bridge spans here and there. Walking over a bridge in Eastern Europe; say, Bosnia-Herzegovina would suit me just fine. At night in the cold...wearing my woolen blue coat, hanging in my closet. I have not worn it since the Tokyo winter of 2007.

Valley of Flames

A little flame; an image of a place and time that unfolded with another person. I think I've seen a similar flame before. I'm stopping now; wondering if I should put it out or let it be. Alas, www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZSjSSazgjQ&feature=PlayList&p=87210601714A9B37&index=0 Exciting but not gentle.